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you have been the one, you have been the one for me

Sunday, April 23, 2006

from tony pierce via binsk.

Put your music player on shuffle. Press forward for each question. Use the song title as the answer to the question. Post on your blog.

will i get far in life?
If I should die - jayz

how do my friends see me?
photography - the starting line

when will i get married?
give me novocaine - green day

what is my best friends theme song?
move along - the all american rejects

what is the story of my life?
the chicken sandwich, the heckler and the kabbash - dane cook

what was high school like?
mother father - dave matthews band

how can i get ahead in life?
back to school - deftones

what is the best thing about me?
deep inside - incubus

how is today going to be?
two words - kanye west ft mos def, freeway

what is in store this weekend?
the worlds greatest - r kelly

what song describes my parents?
london beckoned songs about money by machines - panic! at the disco

my grandparents?
a little less sixteen candles, a little more touch me - fall out boy

how is my life going?
one weak - deftones

what song will they play at my funeral?
kill you - eminem

how does the world see me?
i am crack - juelz santana

will i have a happy life?
lights and sounds - yellowcard

what do my friends really think of me?
4ever - the veronicas

do people secretly lust after me?
i dont know - lostprophets

how can i make myself happy?
hostages - dead poetic

what should i do with my life?
session - linkin park

will i ever have children?
its time to party - andrew wk

what is some good advice?
stitches - orgy

what is my signature dancing song?
straight out of line - godsmack

what do i think my current theme song is?
rape me - nirvana

what does everyone else think my current theme song is?
right thurr remix - 50 cent ft young buck

what kind of women do you like?
shake - ying yang twins ft pitbull

what do you think of this meme?
nothing else matters - metallica

posted by accident at 2:55:00 PM + |

Sunday, April 09, 2006

how to be my kind of woman, by mosephus jones.

if you drink wine at a bar, you are not my kind of woman.

if you are holding hands with anybody at the bar, you are not by kind of woman.

if the color of your drink matches the color of your a. shirt b. shoes c. nail polish, you are definitely not by kind of woman.

if you dance by yourself, you are not by kind of woman.

if you dance with a bar stool, you are not my kind of woman.

if you go to a bar to hang out with a barkeep, you are not by kind of woman.

if you shamelessly fake sexual interest in the owner of a club, just so you dont have to pay cover cuz you think you are better than everyone you just skipped in line, trust me, you are not anyones kind of woman.

if you think porn is gross, you are not my kind of woman.

if you cannot recite three lines each from the Godfather part uno, goodfellas, and scarface, you are not my kind of woman.

if you havent seen all of the above listed movies, plus Godfather part deux and Closer, you should kick yourself in the head. oh, and you are not my kind of woman.

if you are more like natalie portman's character in Closer than julia roberts' character in Closer, you are not my kind of woman.

if you cannot handle a guy calling you out for being a stuckup bratty bitch, you are a golddigger.

if you are a golddigger, you are not my kind of woman.

if you are the hottest thirty five year old, mother of two adult film actress in the world, and you personally handcrafted one of the best wines in the world.

woah, man. you are my kind of woman.

mexico chronicles coming soon. mo out.

posted by accident at 12:50:00 AM + |

Saturday, March 11, 2006

the devil went down to mexico, and that devil's name was mo.

tequila will be shot and hearts will be broken. pics and stories in six days and seven nights. peace!

posted by accident at 1:05:00 PM + |

Thursday, March 02, 2006

fernando vargas for trying to smuggle a baseball into a boxing match

this guy for chopping his million dollar ferrari in half with a telephone pole

dubya for showing everyone that osama is not the only one hiding from america in afghanistan

anna kournikova, for going on the lohan coke diet (sorry, tony)

and coach k, for being a pretentious, hoity toity stain on the game of basketball.

be sure to tune in next week to see meredith grey, the officials at this weekend's Game, and a certain young greek brunette from new york.

posted by accident at 11:39:00 PM + |

Thursday, February 23, 2006

directed by charles shyer
jude law marisa tomei omar epps nia long susan sarandon sienna miller

jude law, jude law, jude law. whatever are we going to do with you. probably the very definition of man candy and he knows it. women want him, and men want to be him. his critics will point out that he tends to be a lot of style with only a little substance, but how can you blame him? he bangs gorgeous blonde actresses two at a time and is adored by millinos over there across the pond. if thats what a lack of substance gets you these days, then bring me a $3000 suit, a haircut, and some of that toothpaste that makes ya teeth go bling! when you smile.

jude's character in this film is even more important that his flashiness. it used to be that in movies, the hero had to be this uber macho roided up hot head, and anything or anyone less than this was a total wuss bag and didnt deserve to save the girl. think rambo, superman, bruce willis, excetera. but in more modern times, the post teenage love drama era, there is a new hero. the smart, smooth, all too confident ladies man. instead of destroying a whole village with a flamethrower and carting off his booty by throwing her over the shoulder, the 21st century leading man makes women faint and fall and pursue him. by outthinking and outplaying women at their own game, this new hero expends much less energy than Early Man. the ramifications of this new hero are astounding. the man doesnt need the fancy car or a big house or lots of guns. the man needs to project confidence and utterly unflappable demeanor to get the girl, finally proving that the best pick up line in the book is a shit eating grin. also see jerry maguire, hitch, spiderman.

charles shyer is most notably the director of steve martin marriage films, ie the father of the bride series. in this film, however, influences from british pop film directors, such as tony scott guy ritchie and numerous other music video producers are easily seen. lots of bright colors, and edits of fast paced artsy short scenes made me feel at times like i watching snatch without the guns and the gangsters. another trick shyer used a great deal were the not so subtle mise en scene billboards when alfie is walking around the city that proudly display large emotion words, such as PERSUASION and DESIRE, in huge letters. these are not typical ways of conveying emotion, but they work kinda like hiding your dirty magazines under the coffee table books in your living room.

stylish and flashy like a pink shirt. highly recommended.

posted by accident at 1:40:00 PM + |

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

i believe in lots of things, and other people believe in lots of things too. sometimes those things dont match up, and thats ok, cuz the important thing is that people have something, anything that they believe in. its almost like the answer to why humans were put on this planet is to believe in something. if not, than what are you here to do? make some money? see some girls' tan lines? take drugs? no way man, theres way more to this world than that. something bigger, greater, more powerful than any fist or missile. to find something to follow to our hearts content.

thats what i believe in.

i believe that good sportsmanship is better than bad sportsmanship

i believe in the sanctity of casual, commitment-less relations with beautiful women.

i believe i can fly.

i believe i am not going anywhere after i die.

i believe in the golden rule: he who has the gold should treat everyone the way he would want to be treated.

i believe in hockey.

i believe that hockey will not survive the next 10 years.

i believe that the pen is mightier that the weapons of mass destruction.

i believe that ive learned everything i needed to know about how to get women through the game of poker.

i believe that poker is as much of a sport as window washing.

i believe in the sand beneath my toes, the beach give a feeling, an earthly feeling...

i believe that baseball is the reason why the world hates America.

i believe that the star spangled banner should be played on electric guitar, not sung, before sporting events.

i believe that all professional athletes should play for twenty dollars an hour, and have no bitching fines written into their contracts.

i believe that a well dressed ugly man gets laid a lot more than an underdressed sugar daddy.

i believe that marisa tomei is the sexiest woman alive.

i believe that by june, i will have slept with three of my bosses at the dealership.

i believe that no one will find out, and i will not get fired.

i believe that no one could survive a single day without good friends and good food.

i believe that lists are windows into the depths of the human soul, without all the pesky paragraphs.

posted by accident at 12:45:00 AM + |

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

one year ago today (ok, not quite today):

carolina vs. duke is the best rivalry in all of sports. period.

baseball is not anything remotely resembling an athletic activity, so yanks-sox arent even in the running. i mean really, who cares about a bunch of overpaid, overweight dads playing catch.

college football is out cuz all the players are slaves of the money machine called the bcs. all bullshit.

rivalries arent driven by money. rivalries are driven by pride. pride for your school, pride for your teamates, pride for your fans.

pride for the name on the front of the jersey and not the one on the back.

at the end of the day, win or lose, a professional athlete gets paid. his kids eat, his wife shops. and ever once in a while, he gets a spot on mtv cribs. even latrell sprewell.

but rashad mccants doesnt do a throat slash playing against a school 10 miles down the road because he gets a bonus. he does it because he wants a W. no matter what.

north carolina basketball players have no contracts to answer to. no general managers. no agents.

just ghosts.

and banners.

and history.

and while a may paycheck speak louder, the ghosts will not be denied.


posted by accident at 2:55:00 PM + |

Thursday, February 02, 2006

20 questions:
1. what on earth could cindy sheehan have possibly done to get arrested?
2. has george dubya bush given a single new speech in the past four years?
3. why do girls think the most of guys who treat them the worst?
4. hey canada, now do you get what the blue states were bitching about?
5. is this really stephanie tanner?
6. does anyone have her phone number?
7. does anyone know why jennifer aniston is moving to albany, new york?
8. true or false: the winter xgames are more popular than the winter olympics.
9. the new bond movie doesnt have a villian or babe cast yet. who do you want to see?
10. shouldnt the leader of the free world wear something other than white shirts and navy suits all the fucking time?
11. does anyone really take hillary clinton seriously?
12. where are my pants?
13. whats worse for the sanctity of marriage, a 43 percent divorce rate or two guys getting hitched?
14. if i said you have a nice body, would you hold it against me?
15. why are people surprised that britney spears has gone all white trash on us?
16. isnt she from bumfuck, mississippi?
17. true or false: terrell owens will never win a super bowl.
18. whos better: jj redick or adam morrison?
19. how do you make your last spring break the one to remember?
20. and when i get back, who wants to see pictures?

discuss amongst yourselves.

posted by accident at 2:29:00 PM + |

Saturday, January 07, 2006

i never learned how to smile. i do it all the time. and laugh too. a lot. but whenever someone says hey, get in this picture of two hot chicks, i always get really nervous. cuz at some point, he'll inevitably say cheese or smile or some variation of that and all of a sudden, i have no clue what to do.

my cheeks do a sort of confused shrug and the corner of my mouth nudge them a little in the wrong direction and somewhere along the line, a tooth or two pops out like a super bowl halftime show. and then theres a flash and its over.

i blame it on other people. totally and completely someone elses fault. as with most things, like driving a stick or writing a term paper, someone has to teach you how to smile. i can do it, but only randomly. if someone tells a funny joke, i smile. if a pretty girl looks me in the eye and says hey there hot stuff, i smile. but its not a conditioned response. i cant pull it out of my ass when someone tells me too.

say cheese, muthafuckas.

posted by accident at 1:37:00 AM + |

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

you can tell when youve been away too long. when you start thinking in hours not minutes, and in years and not days. we come, we go, but we never stay the same. the high school buddy in the powder blue jersey on tv you havent seen in a lifetime is different, a stranger. he doing big things now, that jersey will take him places beyond his wildest dreams. maybe beyonds yours too.

but when you get to that point, it might seem like youre far off and away, but its doesnt take as much to get back as you might think. actually its just two things.

a leap of faith and a quiet thank you.

ive been gone so long that the parking lot full of cars at work is starting to look a lot like stacks and stack of destroyed denim jeans and long sleeve polo shirts. even the faces are different. you learn something about yourself teaching high school kids to wax and sell cars, but thats another story for another time. lots of new people, to whom i, tenured at a long six months, am the senior salesman. senior enough to get called in when they need help, even if im not availible. i know youre not availible, she said, but i called you on a leap of faith that you might want to come in, even if its just to hang out with me. i said i have to check with my hot date tonight, we'll see.

i walked into the stock room to clock in and put down my jacket. when she saw me her eyes lit up, and she told me to close the door.

what for

she grabbed me and we kissed, under 1979 buicks hanging from the ceiling.

thank you, she said.

maybe thats why we go away, just to come back. just to get back. make that leap of faith so that maybe after ive been away so long, everyone will be so happy to see me. just because i was gone.

thank you.

posted by accident at 12:44:00 PM + |

Monday, November 07, 2005

by that morning, i had forgotten who she was. the old trick where i go through her purse and look at her drivers license didnt help either. she laid in the bed next to me, wearing next to nothing. i probably enjoyed that part quite a bit last night, but now im not so sure. the only thing i really remembered was how we were introduced and what a long strange coincidence it was.

hi, my name is so and so, and its my birthday.

shes really little, i thought. a short brunette with a few curves in the right places and smooth skin all over. shes smiled, a lot, and she loved to do it. she told me she was on the dance team or was some kinda dancer, and watching her on the floor, it was easy to see why dancing to most folk is the language of sex. it was here in the soft sunlight that i remembered she was quite fluent, and that taught me a few words last night.

it used to be that this was the easy part. the make like a tree and put your pants on part. there was never any shame walking down franklin street on a saturday morning with messed up hair and nowhere to go but home, but today is a bit different. cant quite put my finger on it, not quite yet.

somewhere between the booze and the bed, theres a feeling. a feeling that people tend to only notice when they want to act on it. a feeling like, i want to be next to someone, that being next to someone would be really nice right now. call it lonliness, call it horniness, call it a need for intimacy, call it what you will. but this girl and this guy and a million other guys and dolls felt it last night, so its hard for me to figure out whats so bad about it.

oh wait.


my guitar is laying on the ground, in the corner, all by its lonesome. its stand is across the room, next to my desk. my tv remote is next to it. the bathroom door is slightly ajar, just enough to see my neon green monogramed towels that say MO in huge blue letters. now i know why this scene, this day is different. this is my room, a place where i dont have to put my pants on for nobody. this morning someone will be doing some walking, and that someone wont be me.

posted by accident at 12:14:00 PM + |

Friday, November 04, 2005

nine months and three days ago today:

i first kissed her on a monday night. the next day was some made up celebration of something called university day, but it got us out of class until 2pm. so we celebrated like we were supposed to.

she sat on the left side and andrew sat on the right side of the couch. i sat right in the middle where i always sit and theres a nice little dip in the padding. she kept getting up to get more vodka. she really really likes vodka.

we were all watching stern but andrew (who is the brit's roomate, and with whom i share a wall) had a test the next day, so he called it a night before the second episode came on. so her and i got some alone time. and i wanted it and i didnt want it at the same time.

she got up to clean something off of the tv and when she came back she straddled me like the extacy girl from garden state when theyre all playing spin the bottle. she really likes that movie, but she gets mad cuz i tell her shes more like zach braff than natalie portman. i just say natalie portman is a brunette duh.

shes just a twenty one yo sophomore with a lot of scars.

i dont know who leaned first, but i remember seeing her eyes close, her head tilting that one way. i remember stroking her cheek with my thumb and rubbing right underneath her ear and she purred. hollywood coulda made a movie out of that kiss.

and the whole time i thought: i cant do this, i shouldnt do this, why is she doing this? why am i doing this?

wow, shes a great kisser. a really great kisser.

i could get used to this.

and then i built up all my courage and what judgement i had left and i ruined that beautiful moment and said do you really want to do this? she looked up at me and smiled.

for everything thats happened, for all those drunken nights. for all the tears and hugs and makeouts and condoms. for all three of us to be bound together like this with no easy way out.

she still hasnt answered me.

posted by accident at 2:05:00 AM + |

Monday, October 17, 2005

this is the best magazine cover of the last forty years.

id have to agree for a number of reasons.


its rolling stone magazine, a pop culture behemoth hiding in low key print journalism clothing.


john lennon is one of the most iconic figures of the twentieth century. his catalogue with The Beatles, and as a solo artist are untouchable, both in sheer volume and quantity. he set fashion trends, political trends, ideological trends.


while he was sadly taken from us too soon, lennon is one of very very very very very few non political figures whose murder is referred to as an assasination.


lots of artsy fartsy visual stuff. soft focus and medium lighting creates a painting-on-canvas effect. neither of the two bodies are looking at the reader, which places focus on the picture as a whole, rather than the star power of yoko and john. through positioning, gender roles are reversed. while women are usually the ones who are objectified through showing skin, here john is the one whos naked, in the fetal position, no less. its not sexual at all, but in fact it displays him as weaker and powerless compared to the fully clothed, comfortably positioned yoko. you see her barely accepting his embrace, as if he is fully and totally subservient to her. this image of their relationship is supported by the public's image of their relationship during his life; one of a loving, affectionate john and a supportive, noninvasive yoko. powerful stuff.


magazine logo is de-emphasized by using a darker color that blended into the overall feel of the picture. funny thing is, bring out the words 'rolling stone' more would have weakened the image, and consequently, weakened sales.


this cover has nothing to do with the crazy crazy weekend i had. there arent any crowded malls, dirty celebrity apartments, or gay cats in bed with mr and mrs ono, but those are stories for another time and another place.


posted by accident at 11:32:00 PM + |

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

nhl hockey
october 2005 - june 2006
oln and fsn

folks, ive been struggling with something for quite some time now.

i think its been about 310 days or so.

thats how long the nhl lockout over collective bargaining took. it was the longest lockout of any north american sports league. ever.

but thats all in the past now.

hockey has returned and its better than ever.

professional level hockey has always been the fastest, most hard hitting, graceful and flowing sport in the world. in a live setting. the problem that hockey has always faced is that all that poetry in motion jazz doesnt translate as well to television. which is just a dumbed down way of saying that american sports fans are an slow bunch and need stoppages of play to keep up.

too bad for hockey that bad tv numbers mean bad numbers on the paychecks too. the nhl has experienced a slow decline in significance to the america sports fan, and that adds up to less and less money for the owners who have to pay the players who want more and more.

something had to break.

the saddest part about the nhl lockout is that hockey has always been a blue collar game. when other major sports leagues has labor disputes, the running joke in hockey circles was that professional athletes should be happy playing for $20 a hour, let alone millions a year. the players lost sight of this ideal, and the players lost big time.

however, we shouldnt lament them too much. the economics of game are now structure so that the league and the players will be able to keep playing for years to come.

the other, maybe greater benefit to come from the lockout process are the new rules of the new nhl. the previous league had gotten so bad, it was almost unwatchable, even for diehard fans like myself. for the non hockey fan, imagine an nfl where linemen can hold, quarterbacks and kickers are free game with or without the ball, and there is no such thing as pass interference. the old nhl game was like that. freeing up the puck carrier, tag up offsides, no two line passes all add up to a faster, cleaner game that is many times more fun to watch. the skaters get space to skate, the shooters get time to shoot, and most importantly, the playmakers get a chance to make plays. cuz even hockey players like to be on sportscenter once in a while.

welcome back.

posted by accident at 11:05:00 AM + |

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

kanye west
late registration
produced by jon brion and kanye west
roc a fella records

on the season premier of saturday night live last weekend, the writers filmed mr west come out of his dressing room and walk around backstage before his performance. standing by the coffee and donuts in the back, he just so happened to run into none other than mr mike myers, snl alum and west's screenmate during the hurricane katrina relief telethon where kanye made his now infamous statements, including "president bush doesnt care about black people."

this moment was probably one of snl's cleverest instance of juxtaposition and social commentary ever. and kanye didnt even say a word.

mr west has become quite a polarizing figure in both the music industry and in american culture in general. the hip hop appreciating public talk about kanye because he makes hit records, not only for himself, but for anyone and everyone that he works with. that list is too long and too diverse and too talented to go in this space.

but the way that musicians, or actors, or athletes cross over into the psyche of mainstream america is through force of character and personality. too often, the mass media will address these quais household names only when they piss someone off by being either arrogant or stupid, and wholly unapologetically so. barry bonds and colin ferrell are two good examples of this phenomenon.

mr west's debut album, college dropout was not only critically acclaimed and wildly successful commericially, it did what no hip hop album had done before. it presented the hyper macho self promoting shouting black man with a mic and a quieter, self-conscious, introspective intellectual in the same breath. the world was amazed, and word spread fast that this college dropout would change the face of music forever.

late registration does nothing but support this idea ten fold. kanye's staple beatmaking style, which combines heavily effected soul samples over melodically instrumental tracks are found on two thirds of the album, but never sound dated or over done. 'golddigger,' 'gone' and 'diamonds' are all shining standouts with that classic kanye feel. he brings along on other tracks a familar crew of friends, including jayz, jamie foxxx, consequence, and glc, all of whom made appearances on the first album as well. on top of the regulars, kanye also brings into the fold some newcommers, like the game, nas,paul wall, adam levine of maroon 5, brandy and camron. all in all, a motley crue indeed.

west's second album is not just college dropout 2005 however. kanye's rapping skills have matured exponentially, while his lyrical style and self-exposing content have never been more keen. west also pushes the production of this album to another level, no doubt the result of working with the multitalented and eccentric jon brion. the most convincing change in kanye's beats stems from more melody and musical movement in his tracks. horns, strings, pianos and the like populate nearly all tracks. the last time the music world talked about a producer/rapper who changed the game with melody and pop sensibility, it was dr. dre's the chronic. that album is nothing short of legendary, and in a few years, hip hop fans might say the same thing about late registration as well.

two thumbs way up. enjoy.

posted by accident at 10:21:00 PM + |

Monday, October 03, 2005

bourbon street bar
333 E Broad St
Athens, GA 30601
september 30 - october 1, 2005

this week is The Week of Reviews here at volume2. sorry, but cinderella on dvd didnt make the cut.

evening, bouncer.

howya doin

heres my id, sir.

studies id carefully

is there a problem?

looks at my shoes, studies some more

son, i dunt thank yew can come in here t'night son. yew gots white shoes on.

(frat boy walks by with white shoes on)

looks at bouncer.

what about him, sir?

well, you gots dem tore up jeans on too son.

(frat boy with ripped jeans walks by)

sir, there must be some kind of mistake here. i just wanna drink some beer man.

well, son, yewr gon haf ta do it sum wur else tnight

look of disbelief.

are you being serious or are you just joking with me?

im sawry, but that thur is the rules. i just werk here.

notices there are only white people at this bar.

well it doesnt seem that those are the rules at all. why dont you tell me what the rules really are around here.

damn, son you got a mouth on yew, doncha now boy?

badass staredown

badass staredown

in case you havent noticed, yewr kind aint real appreciated around here, so why don yew jus run along home now boy.

(crazy drunk friend starts shouting fuck the dawgs, go jackets, dawgs suck, and other such expletives).

sorry for disturbing your kkk meeting. have a good night.

yall take care.

posted by accident at 10:59:00 AM + |

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

directed by paul haggis
sandra bullock don cheedle matt dillon jennifer esposito brendan fraser terrance howard chris bridges thandie newton ryan phillippe larenz tate michael pena.

i heard about this movie on mtv. suchin pak was talking to ludacris and all of a sudden he goes hey i have a movie coming out and then i have a nother movie coming out. the first one he was talking about was this one. the second one was hustle and flow.

turns out this one is not really "his" movie, and thats a really really good thing. its another one of those clusterfuck of stars kinda movies, with a starring cast too long to mention in a breath.

at the root of things, crash is about racism. pure blatant unadulterated saying things that everyone thinks but no one has the balls to say in public racism. racism in america, more specifically, and racism in one of the most diverse cities in the world, the city of angels, los angeles.

with so many characters and so many stories and so many plots and subplots, and with how much all of them are intertwined, its hard to pick out defining points. i guess the main theme is that, when it comes to racism and stereotypes and what people think of other people, no one is completely bad and no one is completely good. sometimes people just work hard to be the best people they can be, and fall under extreme circumstances.

sometimes people make decisions for the worse or for the better, and then, in a moment of weakness or strength, completely erase what they did before.

pretty much the best thing about this movie is that there are no heroes, and as depressing as that sounds, its really not that bad. the lines arent black and white (no pun intended), so the audience has to go figure them out for themselves. you leave the theater thinking, and thats the best part.

highly recommended. much better than glitter. enjoy.

posted by accident at 11:53:00 PM + |

Sunday, September 18, 2005

this week in gratuitous pics of fine women:

never mind the dudes. theyre just along for the ride.

posted by accident at 4:03:00 AM + |

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Bush:"I take responsibility."
"President George W. Bush took responsibility on Tuesday for any failures in the federal government's response to Hurricane Katrina that struck two weeks ago and acknowledged the storm exposed deficiencies at all levels of government four years after the September 11 attacks."

Bush takes responsibility for blunders:

" the extent the federal government didn't fully do its job right, I take responsibility..."

read more about it here, and here, but for some reason, not to be found here or here.

posted by accident at 12:30:00 PM + |

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

fifteen minutes to one am east coast time. sounds like a tight squeeze, but itll have to do.

ive imposed a one am bedtime for myself on school nights for the rest of the year. i really have a lot on my plate right now, and i dont do any of it after ten, so if im still up this late, im just fucking around my house, watching tv, or worse, blogging. if ive learned anything in three years of college, its that i like to sleep and that i need to get more of it.

anyway, i said that there were some important things that i needed to talk about tonight. these will come a little fast, so see if you can keep up:

katrina: a completely tragic situation. i wish i could do more than donate 15,000 dollars to the red cross.

rehnquist: sudden, but not unexpected. replacing one of the most powerful men in washington is just another thing for bush to fuck up.

bush: hes fucking up. nuff said.

whew, now that we have all that out of the way, lets get back to business.

i got an email yesterday from a kid in dallas wondering why i dont just quit my job at the dealership so i can fuck, i mean date jennifer aniston. he says that she so smokin hot that it would be worth it to be unemployed for a while, wouldnt it?

to that i have to say, yes and no.

i talked before about how it feels when a gorgeous girl whispers sweet nothings in your ear and tells you she wants you. its an amazing feeling, so amazing in fact that, if only for a day or two, i actually asked myself paris who? and really believed that i had forgotten about her.

but the thing is that i really like my job. i think retail sales is highly underrated. ive learned so much in the few months that ive been at the dealership. meeting a bunch of new people everyday, learning about those people, trying to get them to give us a whole lotta money. those kinds of skills are what are important in a real world job, not some piece of paper from a big school with a seal on it.

but dont get things twisted folks. this is not a job i see myself doing for another ten years, like the head manager, syd. he started as a saleman when he was 19 years old and hes going on 234 next month. i plan on not working there anymore sometime within the next year or so, so im not going to say that this job is my priority over all other priorities.

so basically, im saying this. if i were to quit my job now, even for legit reasons like the low pay, lack of hours, and constantly getting hit on by the gay guy in financing, deep down i know that i would also be quitting just so i could date jennifer. doing anything for the sake of following a girl should only be done under the most serious of circumstances, and my little thing with the recently single ms aniston is in no way a serious circumstance. on top of that, quitting just to date her would put tremendous pressure on that relationship to actually work out and last for an extended period of time. let me remind you folks that we havent even been on a date yet. that pressure, in and of itself, is enough to torpedo any relationship, especially one that hasnt even started yet.

so, for now, im just holding steady. i might start casually browsing the classifieds, i might start nonchalantly flirting with her around the office a bit more than usual. or i might not be. we'll see.

posted by accident at 11:50:00 PM + |